*many spoilers* Pet Sematary (2019) Dir: Kevin Kolsch, Dennis Widmyer Everyone's really pissed about this remake. And under usual circumstances, I would be too. I'm normally a bit of a purist, and utterly detest remakes based on their sheer futility. Does the world even need 10 versions of "A star is born"? No-one knows the … Continue reading Sometimes remakes are better
Shit got real
CAMPING; part two
The Ritual 2017 Dir: David Bruckner Perhaps i'm a little biased, but Brits are definitely making the best horror movies at the minute. Maybe not the best ever, (after extensive scientific research I've concluded that Koreans make the best ever), but we are getting considerably better. More importantly directors have stopped using stupid british stereotypes and taking the … Continue reading CAMPING; part two
Simon’s Bullshit
The Gift (2015) Dir: Joel Edgerton When Joel Edgerton sat down and made this film did he literally just think "Hmm....how random and absurd could one plot twist be? Let's find something a bit far fetched, roll with that for a bit, and then, right at the end... lets just fuck shit up completely" Don't … Continue reading Simon’s Bullshit
Vice Docs gone wrong
The Sacrament (2013) Dir: Ti West Three flannel wearing, New York hipsters who work for Vice (stay with me), go to the middle of nowhere to find some dude's sister ("Patrick" being dude in question). In short she joined a cult dressed up as a rehab center, found God, and sent her brother a letter … Continue reading Vice Docs gone wrong
Revisited: Orphan
Well...what can I say. Round of applause to the guy that made this. YOU sir, deserve a drink. like...where do I even begin? I've spend the past hour shouting profanities at my laptop and wanting a 9 year old dead so badly (even though she's really 33...we'll get there), that my brain is actually overwhelmed … Continue reading Revisited: Orphan
The Visit….sure
Every now and again comes a director so mind-blowingly overrated you almost feel compelled to hate them just to level out the playing field a bit. Even though not all of them are as evil and self obsessed as say, Christopher Nolan (just picking names out a hat here guys), you've decided by default that … Continue reading The Visit….sure
Deliver us from tired scripts
Sometimes I go and watch horror movies and I'm all like "meh". The usual haunted house/scary Japanese chick with long hair/young possessed catholic girl/ hillbillies who eat people situation. As a horror fan you get so used to these formulas then eventually you're just like immune...and often jaded...and that's fine I guess, just a bit … Continue reading Deliver us from tired scripts
Maniac: Revisted
Even though it wasn't actually out that long ago, (fine...its only recently become available on Netflix). I feel that this month's revisited should go to Elijah Wood for acting like a crazy fool. Or Frodo goes Loco as Total film put it. He's actually so mind-blowing crazy in this film its beyond words.The worst part … Continue reading Maniac: Revisted
Jagged little Beth- episode recap
Poor Beth, all she ever wanted from Daryl was a shoulder to cry on, in fact all she wants to do is cry, and talk about her feelings and then maybe cry some more, but as was made mind-blowingly obvious from the last episode, Daryl is a redneck, and rednecks aren't really into tears, or … Continue reading Jagged little Beth- episode recap
Posession for beginners. How to avoid moving into a demonic house, and other real estate issues
You're a perfectly nice person, with a perfectly lovely family. No-one in your household has a history of mental illness, throws any kind of temper tantrums, or even really argues. Generally the overall tone of your residency is mellow, and you're kind of awesome. And then you move into a big old house with a … Continue reading Posession for beginners. How to avoid moving into a demonic house, and other real estate issues
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